Tuesday, August 1, 2017

Disabled in an able-bodied world....


It's an uphill struggle to be disabled in an able-bodied world. To know what it feels like, you have to be disabled yourself. It's not something you can easily describe though. For instance, how does a black man describe what it's like to black. He can't (apart from being used as target practise in America). The only redeeming factor is that he knows he's not alone in this world. I can't be alone although I feel very much like i am though, as i try to come to terms with it all.

i've been through enough hard and embarrasing situations for me not to worry about anything in my way. It's hard being disabled. I'll not act the tough-guy and say it isn't. There have been many times when i've felt enough is enough. Then i wake up the next day and face new challenges. There's always something on the hoizon. It feels like the ultimate test of endurance sometimes.
Then i go on to blogger and get treated like an outcast. It's not true of everyone i've met, though. Not everybody should be tarred with the same brush as not everyone treats me the same. I've not done anything to deserve it and it left me wishing i hadn't joined the site in the first place.
Being disabled is all it takes and is something you should remember if you join the site: Keep your disability a secret.

How they would have got on if they were disabled is something i can't say. They may have exceeded expectation or they might not. I wouldn't like to imagine. What i can say, though, is that i wouldn''t have treated them like dirt. I would now. Still, i find it hard to inflict them them with any lasting grief if i can. Even though i have a brain injury, i still remember who tried to cause me biggest brain injury of all, and it wasn't SALT. That's a first then.

23 comments:

  1. Hi Terry :) I can't say I can relate totally to you, but I guess in my own way I have felt discriminated against - and though I pay zero attention to strangers who leave nasty comments on my blog - I just delete them with smile these days - the people who have hurt me the most were the people who were "closest" to me - ex-family members and one ex-friend. Weird thing. The ex-friend used to make nasty comments about how "lucky" I was to be on disability and not have to work every day of my life like she does...oh how easy my life should be! Gosh I hated her for a while, but that passed and I learned that I just can't change other people's ignorance, I can only change how I react. It was a learning curve, and it still bothers me when my own disabilities aren't taken seriously, but there is nothing I can do about it but just keep my head high and keep being me. I am an open book, it's just who I am and I won't hide my challenges and failings ever any more because I have to right to be myself. You told me once you were giving me the "gospel according to Terry" well, I guess my comment was the "gospel according to Rain"!!! :) Glad to see your post! :)) Now I must read your post to my Cheddar before her nap. LOL.

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  2. I just felt so numbed by it all. I left a comment on a blog and the next day it was gone. I thought "what happened to it?" Again I left a message. The next day it was gone. I thought "what's going on here?" Then I realised that I was being shut out.

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  3. I've had that happen too, it's upsetting. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I know it sounds cliché but the truth is that you are better than anyone who wants to delete you and shut you out. I remind myself of that all the time.

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  4. Sometimes it is ignorance, sometimes it is stupidity. After my diagnosis while I was still working my boss took to talking s.l.o.w.l.y and loudly to me. And using little words. I asked her not to. She persisted. Finally when she did it again in a meeting with other departments I dropped my jaw and dribbled at her. 'Wots that u say? I dinna unnerstand'. She stopped. And later complained that I had publically humilated her. Sigh.

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    1. I understand how you were humiliated because I was too. No explanation was given.

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  5. I'm sorry that there are other people around here worse than the dreaded SALT. At least you can ignore ignorant bloggers. Hope you have some luck with the salt people.
    Welcome back

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  6. I'm not bothered about them anymore. I try and tell myself not to let them get to me.

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  7. So pleased that when I visited today you had posted ...
    Here's to more posts too.

    All the best Jan

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  8. There are a lot of wonderful bloggers around. Stick with those. And ditch the rest!

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    1. I've never been part of a clique and don't intend to join one now.

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  9. I have you on my blog list so I don't miss your posts. Was so glad to see a new one today. I'm not too sure that there are that many able-bodied people around any more. Seems everyone has a different degree of ability these days. I've spent the last two days at the chiropractor doing assessments and X-rays and have agreed to a treatment plan starting right away. I'm vowing to get well and get as much mobility back as my age and back will allow. My spine was fused in the lower back area in 2007, and I had hoped that would do the trick, but apparently not. I have stuck my head in the sand and tried to ignore the need to return to treatment, but reading your blog made me realize that I need to be more proactive and responsible for my health. Your struggle to gain freedom for things like eating what you want as long as it's not going to harm your health, made me realize I too could do something to make my life better. I don't think you realize the positive effect you have on others. That's why I decided to share this with you and to say Thank You for being brave enough to bring disability issues to the forefront of discussion.

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    1. I think very few people will be lucky enough to get to old age without seeing the doctor. Health Centre waiting rooms with people packing them out will be a regular occurrence as we get older. We're not all to blame either.That's just the way life is Our lifestyle doesn't help. If you're luck enough to always be healthy then good luck.

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  10. None of us knows what tomorrow will bring. That's both good and bad, I guess. My dad would talk about being able to walk again (he never did). His girlfriend used to outright discourage him, saying she didn't want to give him false hope. I disagreed; why take all hope away? I used to tell him, you never know what will happen tomorrow ...

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  11. It's good to see you posting! Don't worry about the stupid people!

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    1. I get th impression that they're not worth worrying qabout

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  12. You never know what will happen and it's no use worrying about it. It always pays to do the best that you can, but there is on guarantee of anything. My mum is 77 and she smoke fags like they've gone out of fashion . My youngest brother is 53,. never smoked in his life and yet he is fighting a cancer battle.. How does that work?

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  13. I am very pleased that you haven't left blogging Terry. I remain a bit puzzled about the blogger who shut you out. As others have suggested above, try to cherish those who treat you as an equal and bugger the ignoramuses. Those of us who follow your blog and appreciate your online presence are greater in number than them.

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  14. I'm sorry that there are other people around here worse than the dreaded SALT


    แตกใน xxx

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  15. That takes some doing. They are the Moriarty to my Sherlock Holmes.

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