The type of pain i have to live with is very physical. I’ve learnt how to deal with it for five years now, and there are other people who’ve been living with the same kind of pain for considerably longer. A method called Positive Mental Attitude is something which i like to use. it’s helped me to stop smoking, quit sugar, caffeine and meat and is a far more effective way for me of coping with the pain unless you’re talking about prescription drugs. The likes of mild painkillers such as paracetamol or cocodamol are just not strong enough to be of any use. I’ve tried them a lot of times without them having any effect. They’re very addictive too and that’s a fact. I wish i was making it up, but i’m not. Prescription drugs are ok up to a point, but i hate having to have injections. I don’t want to be reliant on them either and the same thing goes for having to rely on something like cannabis. I have enough drugs, like my medication for instance, without worrying about other concoctions.
The pain is something i only feel in the morning, when i wake up. (If i’m lucky) It’s intense though. I know it’s something i’ll always have to go through for as long as i live. Gritting my teeth together seems to help a bit. It certainly makes a difference to when i’m grinding them. I’ve done quite a lot of that, recently. I’ve got so used to feeling pain now, that i tend not to let it worry me. I just remind myself that there are other people going through far worse than me. My legs hurt because i can’t bend them any more than i do. Blood comes out of the multiple scratch marks i have made on my legs and my neck hurts to the point where i can’t turn it. My leg exercises are tough and i don’t look forward to doing them. It’s the nearest i get to keeping myself fit, though. The wheelchair i spend all day in, puts such pressure points on my buttocks, which doesn’t help.
There is the psychological pain of not being able to talk very much in the 5 years since i’ve had the stroke. It’s annoying when you have to keep repeating yourself over and over again. Talking is never easy anyway and something, which you used to take for granted, like walking/eating/drinking becomes a challenge to you. Forget about walking. You just can’t do it anymore. There’s more chance of Leicester City winning some silverware than you getting to walk again. In other words... it aint gonna happen!
i said earlier that i only feel pain in the morning. That isn’t strictly true. I feel it at night too. My legs are always at a forty five degree angle and it’s uncomfortable but i hope that i’ll get some sleep to take away the pain that i’m feeling tonight. I can’t get rid of all the pain that i”m feeling. I know that, but i can make it more bearable. Then they ask me the next day if i want to wear a blue shirt or a yellow one. Does it matter? Really? It’s ok having a positive mental attitude but it gets stretched to the limit sometimes.
I can't imagine having to live with excruciating pain like this for a week, let alone 5 whole years. And I know that some of those painkillers can become addictive, causing even more problems. I'm glad that you've used the power of positive thinking to minimize it as best you can. Sending HUGE Hugs your way. RO
ReplyDeleteThanks RO, pain is something I have to endure whether I like it or not. It’s just one of those things.
DeleteYour comment about grinding your teeth makes me worry, Terry - that could cause teeth issues down the line, and add to your pain. Do you have a dentist you can talk to about a device to protect your teeth? Then again maybe it won't be a problem for you. I've been grinding my teeth all my life and now wear a device at night to stop me doing it in my sleep. I'm sorry to hear you have so many kinds of pain. My dad suffered from sitting so much in the wheelchair, too. He eventually got a special seat cushion that had pockets of air in it to help distribute his weight. It was better than the old one but he still had a great deal of pain, just as you have. His carers tried to get him to rest on his bed after lunch every day to take the strain off his bottom and his back.
ReplyDeleteI admire your grit, my friend. You are an inspiration. And I'm ashamed of my whining when I have an ache or pain. I will think of your attitude instead and try to do the same.
They’ve told me I should try and rest every day. I’ll ask about getting some teeth protection. Just really good advice.
DeletePain can be a soul-sucker can't it? I can remembered sneering when a presenter at a pain management clinic pointed out that it impacts on every aspect of life. Sneering because chronic pain was a requirement to attend the lecture and he was pointing out (as if it was new) something we were all familiar with. Too familiar.
ReplyDeleteI try and avoid drugs, but sometimes weaken.
Distraction works for me often. And denial (not just a river in Egypt).
I’ve been without drugs so far. I could be accused of being in Denial (a river in Egypt). ; )
DeleteThat is just a bummer! I get s o cranky if I have pain
ReplyDeleteKylie, I get cranky if I have pain.i’ve been In pain for five years now anit’s not worth it anymore. The staff can’t do anything about it. I’m not going to take it out on them.
DeletePain can suck the life out of you and make life so miserable. I've known pain for years when my back was injured during childbirth 44 years ago. It was more like a deep discomfort than a deep pain but I just couldn't lay still for more than 15 minutes, I had to change position constantly and my sleep was very disrupted because of the constant spasms in my back. I've never know the pain associated with constant sitting in a wheel chair but I do believe you that it's very uncomfortable.
ReplyDeleteI can see where the power of positive thinking can give you strength to put up with it.
I was watching a motivational speaker on Youtube, by the name of Nick Vujicic. He uses an electric wheelchair to get around and he was born without arms or legs. For what he's lacking, he makes up in sheer positive thinking, willpower and determination and he does amazing things. He's married and has a family. I'm sure you must have heard of him but in case you didn't, you might like to check his video or even images.
Hugs, Julia
Thanks, Julia. I’ll see if I can find it.
DeleteHi Julia, I’ve spent all afternoon watching Nick Jujovic videos....
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you enjoyed watching his motivational videos. He's quite good at everything he does despite missing arms and legs.
DeleteHe knows what he’s best at doing. Credit to him.
DeleteI have known excruciating pain but not the kind of pain that greets someone each morning for months on end. You must be a tough guy to cope with that pain Terry. It would grind me down.
ReplyDeleteIf anyone can do it - you can do it, Yorkie!!!
DeleteIt sounds really tough but you seem to have found coping mechanisms. Pain can be very difficult to deal with. I admire your determination and strength. Does keeping a blog and writing about these experiences help you at all?
ReplyDeleteWriting about my experiences really does help because it gives me the discipline I so badly need. Keeping a record of everything that happens to me and how I feel about stuff is so important to me. For instance, today is day 44 of going without sugar. Day 365 is a long way off but every day starts somewhere. I want to reach365 days so badly. This is where positive mental attitude comes in to play. Any pain I get is nothing to worry about.so long as I do 365 days. I try to keep my mind focused on that.
ReplyDelete