Number nine

They could have told me : “you’re going to be laid up for a while” and i would have said “ok”. I knew i would walk again when i got better (whenever that was). It would be a simple illness and then i would be okay. But to have something like walking completely taken away from me is just too much to ask. I would never see my friends again, and then i would curl up and die. There has to be more to life than this. There has to be. I’m not afraid of dying and i don’t think anybody else should be.

if you are, then maybe you should come and and live the life that i do. The last five and a half years have been painful. And on a daily basis. Having a loved one go through this torture is something i would dread. Let me have it, instead. I wonder if each day will be the last that i spend on earth. I’m lucky to be alive. Ha, such luck! If only they knew and were made to live my life, then maybe they wouldn’t make such crass comments.


  1. Oh Terry.
    I am sorry. I hope you can ignore those people who base YOUR luck on THEIR ignorance.

  2. And chances are that at least one of them will eventually understand it by finding themselves disabled, but it won't be in time to prevent the current comments. I think they may be trying to be helpful, but it isn't (helpful, I mean). I'm sorry things are so hard there. My dad would have given one of his arms if he could have had both legs working again.

  3. People should just not comment on other's luck or their abilities, disabilities and illnesses. It's always inappropriate and usually hurtful

  4. Often, people can't find the right words to say....they don't know what to say....too often what is said comes across as sounding crass...but beneath the words uttered...the meaning has depth; depths of caring...and are sincere...although those speaking them can't ever understand what you're having to deal with day after day, hour after hour....

  5. Dearest Terry, my heart goes out to you, and I know it's so rough. I just wish I could reach out with very long elastic arms to hug you as you rightly deserve right now. You are always in my thoughts! RO


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